mind stretching

Had one of my moments today. Was standing in the kitchen and was suddenly aware of the fact I exist. And that the cupboard is blue. That I can even perceive the cupboard is blue. It gave me the usual little shiver. My mind goes ‘boiiing’ as I try to wrap it round the mere fact of existence (although what is ‘mere’ about existence?). It’s like trying to squeeze into a pair of jeans way too small. Except they are way too big, and you are trying to stretch, but all you touch is open space. (I know friends who identify heartily with me on this point, but I know some would look at me as if I am one scone short of a cream tea.)

And what of a higher intelligence than mine? If God exists and is fully God with all his characteristics, he understands existence. Stretching my mind to grasp that a mind that vast exists….nope, can’t do it. Is it so strange to believe there is an intelligence bigger than mine? I encounter it all the time. Many people are more intelligent than I am, being able to comprehend things that I just cannot. Not just the genius amongst us, but those with a certain leaning, or a specific field or natural talent. Some people can just learn and digest things very quickly. We have such a vast array of qualities and various kinds of intelligence merely in our own species, which then is compared to other living creatures – those who exhibit types of intelligence, also varying (one can see there are relatively intelligent dogs, and also not so intelligent dogs). It would be beyond their intelligence to think about my intelligence. So if even within my own species there is such a range of degrees, how can I dismiss the idea of an intelligence bigger than all of us? Just because I cannot stretch my mind to fit the idea….

I am not making an argument for anything. I am simply wondering at the fact that the cupboard is blue, and that I exist to see it.