the singing steam engine

Andy has been introducing me to Ivor the Engine this past month.  I am quite hooked.  I couldn't find the episode I wanted to post, so here's episode one, for those of you who are uneducated on this subject.  I couldn't find a better quality clip, I'm afraid.  We have it on DVD!

breaking the block...

I always find it rather hard to start writing when I haven't been doing so for a few days...I get out of the habit and suffer a kind of blogger's block, I suppose! The best way to break any kind of writer's block, in my experience, is to start by writing anything, even if it's complete rubbish. So, here I am. (Although having said that, my parents are coming to stay on Wednesday, so I'll probably be absent yet again for a while!)

Andy had last week off work, after the busy-ness of Easter, and it was good to just relax and spend time together. We had a couple of nice days out, which I may recount here, at some point. (For less regular readers, 'at some point' can mean anything from next week to never.)

I have been catching up a bit around the house and cleaning out Charlie's hutch, giving him a bottom dunking as well, what joy. Started making some more bird cake since they are just about to finish off their third fat tube. They certainly do love it.

Not entirely convinced the goldfinches are going to continue nesting in next doors' tree. Not much activity lately, and I spied the blue tits stealing nest material from it last week, which isn't very hopeful, goldfinch wise. However, they are still coming through and feeding, together with the blue tits and great tits and blackbirds all in 'courtship mode'.

My, isn't this entry exhilarating....

Andy at a meeting this evening, so watched a Primeval episode recorded on Saturday before coming up here to get some stuff together for Youth Housegroup tomorrow. Andy has given up on Primeval but I am still watching it for a pleasant bit of silliness. OK, so the underlying plot is somewhat convoluted and hard to follow - and you can't work out if that's because it is too complex, or not complex enough. Like Steven, Cutter is now dead (killed by sinister amoral former wife Helen) and Jenny seems to be suddenly more like Claudia Brown's personality in this series, which is somewhat ironic as Nick (Cutter) was the only person who remembered Claudia's existence in the first place. (Except perhaps Helen, but I doubt she cares). Of course, dying in Primeval can mean anything really, and watch out for the clones, of course. Connor is as always looking apologetic and perplexed, and he and Abby continue to adopt mini-dinosaur-type pets without batting an eyelid. The acting is...mixed. The special effects are good. There are quintessentially British moments - when a huge dinosaur head, Jurassic Park style, raises itself to peer into the window of a plane, one pilot says with mild fascination, "now there's something you don't see every day".

(Pause for breath.)

All right, so most of you haven't got a clue what I'm on about, but never mind.
I did warn you it might be rubbish.

Sort of.

the Passion on screen

Browsing through the Radio Times, there doesn't seem to be much Easter-oriented religious programming on in Holy Week. Bar the Greatest Story Ever Told on Channel 4 on Good Friday, the only other thing I could make out was last year's The Passion, from the BBC, being aired in full on BBC4 on Wednesday (I talked a little bit about it last year, search under label 'Easter').

(There is also a programme on Handel's Messiah on Good Friday, but i get the impression it is more about the composer than the subject matter - perhaps I'm wrong.)

This seems ironic to me as Good Friday's spread in RT actually illustrates the events of the "original" Good Friday, crosses at the top, Jesus' followers one side and Roman soldiers the other. But actually finding something relating to it is difficult. Usually there is more relevant programming than this.

Speaking of the Passion, I sat down to watch Mel Gibson's The Passion of the Christ not that long ago. I know some find it a profound reminder of what happened to Jesus (and I respect that), but for me I'm afraid it was a turn off. The flogging scene was so much focused on the actual gore that I was hiding behind a cushion, not from distress at what was happening to Jesus but because I was totally 'grossed out' for want of a better phrase - seeing skin being ripped off with nails from the lashes was just too much.

My reaction was akin to someone squeamish turning away from a Casualty operation scene than it was to being moved by the events of that day. In the end I was forced to fast forward it to the crucifixion, where I watched Mary kiss Jesus' toes and come away with a mouth covered in blood (ugh), before going on, finally, to the resurrection. By this point I was in such a grossed-out state that it did not have much effect for me.

For me, this was the first portrayal of the crucifixion and previous events that hasn't brought me to tears in some time, because I was so grossed out by the gore, with an underlying awareness of the 'special effects' being used to their utmost (e.g. skin being ripped off).

In the light of the chunk of the film taken up by the flogging - initially I managed to watch but after a while started wondering when it would be over, I found myself quite unmoved in the traditional sense. I think it was because it focused on the Passion itself rather than any previous story about Jesus there wasn't time to build up love and sympathy for the character (this purely an observation of the focus of the film rather than my own faith). And then there was this overload of gore, which for me overcast everything else.

Like I said, I know there are those who are moved by this film, and I don't want to undermine this. Neither do I want to deny the awful suffering of Jesus. I simply found the visuals too gory and gross to actually derive any meaning from it. I don't think I am super-super squeamish (although I probably get more so as I get older), but this was just too much for too long for me. And I watched it while Andy was out, so I was dealing with it by myself.

I'd be interested in hearing anybody else's thoughts.


***
Oh, a related question that I'm always thinking whenever watching any on screen recount of the story of Jesus. Why does he always have to be white?!! Most likely he was dark skinned, neither black nor white (very fitting, in fact). It may have been the way he was portrayed in medieval art (with the additional bizarrity¹ of blond hair, blue eyes, halo etc) but can we finally see a physically realistic Jesus?

¹ Not officially a word, as far as I know.

***

Today: 3-4/10, medium high

for the love of Niles

We are, among other things, working our way through all the series of Frasier; working life being some what unpredictable, DVD box sets make good presents for us as we can watch them as and when. I love watching it, but confess that Frasier is not my favourite person on the show; in fact Frasier in hyper-mode is something that has me cringing and burrowing my head under the nearest cushion so I don't have to watch him digging himself deeper and deeper. However, when it comes to Niles... Niles. I confess - I watch Frasier for Niles.

Today: 4/10, medium

the weekend unwrapped (a little)

Frankly, I can't be bothered with a list of ratings as to 'how I was' this past weekend. Rather, I shall simply note that my energy levels were similar to what they have been recently, and that considering what we did over the weekend, I did reasonably well. My headache is just bad overall at the moment. Obviously Saturday, being a day at Greenbelt, involved major rule breaking as far as the programme goes; I attempted to rest in the car on the way, but the others were impossible to keep.

Rest stop 3 coincided with a talk by Philip Yancey, except that we were sitting in front of the grandstand, which resulted in the strange sensation of his voice on one side and his echo on the other, and as I kept needing to lie back on the rug rather than sit uncomfortably, I didn't hear various parts of what he was saying. Still, it enabled me to be reasonably 'restful' to some degree.

We did go to another seminar earlier, entitled 'God, gods and Galactica', which sounded a promising title but frankly we found it disappointing. It seemed more of a beginners' guide to the basic plot and characters of Battlestar Galactica rather than anything else - and I suspect most of the people in the room were familiar with that already. I was interested in how they would approach and discuss the different belief systems of the Cylons and the humans - and where the series' seemed to be going with this - but this was barely touched on except to say what they were, right at the end. It didn't live up to the title, anyway.

In the evening we basically stationed ourselves on the field in front of the mainstage. It rained at one point, but we had our waterproofs on, sat on our chairs, and turned our water-proof bottomed rug upside down over our legs. (Very useful having a water-proof bottom - and we weren't the only ones.) We looked like an elderly couple sitting determinedly on a British beach in the rain (!)

Still, the rain receded and those who had escaped from it returned. We stayed there until the last act was over - Seth Lakeman, whom Andy particularly wanted to see. I have to say he was very good. And it's hard not to be impressed by someone who can sing, play the violin vigorously, and create a resounding beat with his foot all at the same time. He also played the guitar and the banjo. Separately.

On Sunday I followed my rest regime as far as possible, with rest stop 1 and 4 catered for, but with the family gathering in the middle. It was good to see everyone and I was enjoying myself very much, but then suddenly the tiredness blasted upon me and I was forced to see that I needed to leave.

We saw friends on Monday, and then travelled home in the evening. A good weekend - if not strictly within the rules!!

Today: 4/10, high

a title completely alludes me today

We've been having some Internet trouble of late. After Andy spending ages on the phone and then reinstalling everything, it seems to be all right at the moment. But if I mysteriously disappear, that will probably be why. Probably. I don't want to limit the reasons for any mysterious disappearance I may undertake... Forgive me - I'm a little random this evening.

Nothing much to report - and alas no profound mind blowing entry - much as I would like to treat you to one. It has been raining quite a lot. But it isn't now.

Yesterday a goldfinch visited our nyger seed feeder - that's a first for us. I've not seen any in our garden since that time I did the Garden Birdwatch. We are watching Springwatch - making a mental tick every time Simon King says 'cracking'...my favourite is 'cracking little bird!' but I don't think he's said that just yet. He's cooing over wildcats and ospreys at the moment, neither of which are little, and one of which isn't a bird. Our garden is quite an activity base at the moment - the benefits of a small garden mean you get more close-up views.

There's a great tit family which keep arriving with great fanfare in next door's tree (which overhangs our fence, so it's known simply as 'the tree'). I think they are the pair we've usually had visiting plus their offspring - very like the adults now except their very distinctive cheep-cheep-cheeping and a smudgy charcoal head instead of the adults' sharp black. I think the blue tits must have fledged and I missed it - there was a furore of activity earlier this week back and forth feeding the chicks (and some very vocal activity inside the box). But I've not noticed them today or yesterday - although I've not been looking out of the window so much. I hope they are all right; it's been so wet. Have a special soft spot after our rescue of one of the parents. Dunnocks aren't fazed by the wet though - one was taking a vigorous bath in a flooded patch of the garden path yesterday, in the rain - I suppose that's what you'd call taking a bath and a shower at the same time.

Still haven't heard from World Vision - sent a second email in case they didn't get the first. Rather frustrating - although I did find the section of their website where you can donate directly to their work in Darfur. I'd just like to have a reply, really, so I can be absolutely certain of the right direction for this. Have compiled first draft of anthology. Got somewhat frustrated (again) yesterday as was trying to find the perfect picture for the front cover - I had it in my mind but couldn't find it. Finally found it today...and it wasn't as good as I thought. I'll get there eventually.

My font option has disappeared and it doesn't seem to respond to my manual html today, although it should have. Mmmph.

**Update - ooh it's working now! And because it is, you won't have a clue what I'm talking about. Am I sensible enough simply to delete the previous sentence? Nah.

Wednesday:4/10, medium
Thursday: 4-5/10, medium
Friday:5/10, medium - low

rebuilding the bicycle

I am finally moving past Genesis 1-11 in my current studies and beginning the Abraham narratives. I could carry on digging and discovering - I have commandeered most of the Genesis commentaries from Andy's office. I have a distinct advantage at having access to so many resources on a personal level; although I suspect as an individual I would have collected some of my own. Certainly there are some that I bought in our collective...er...collection. Together we have built up quite a library.
Anyway, I have left blank pages in my bible reading journal so that I can go back over things if I want.

Yesterday's entry and my studies remind me of what it felt like to study theology at college. Some of the most breathtaking discoveries were so simple, not complicated or complex matters but merely taking off the cultural lenses we don't realise we're wearing, or reading what the bible really says and not what we assumed it meant. It's not an easy process. I remember Mary Evans talking about the effect on faith - like taking a bicycle apart, polishing up the pieces, and putting back together. There is a point where everything is completely dismantled and you can't imagine it otherwise. But it does go back together - brighter, stronger - and much less brittle. It...bounces. (I think we have moved away from the bicycle analogy, since I have never met a bouncy bicycle.) Instead of continuously on the defense, it absorbs new challenges and new ideas, assessing them without feeling threatened by them. Changing shape, sometimes, because of them - and other times rejecting them and being unaffected.

Anyway. Have just watched Doctor Who. I like Donna. She's a strong and likeable character. Went slightly apoplectic with excitement at the return last week. I think this will be a good series. Now there's a change of subject for you.

Energy levels: 4-5/10
Headache: Medium - Low

a brief note on The Passion

I feel I should comment further after having watched Sunday's episode, in case it slips my mind. I did like the episode, although it felt rather short. We were both rather thrown initially by the use of different actors for Jesus, but when he broke the bread and we saw the 'real' Jesus I thought it was actually very effective. However, I feel if that technique was going to be used, Mary should also have seen the 'real' Jesus after realising who she was talking to, to give that same spine-tingling impact. In that scene, giving Jesus a mixture of his own words and those of the angel in the biblical account ('why do you look for the living among the dead?') served to cause a little too much confusion.

Speaking of angels, the whole thing seemed to have a tendency to avoid anything 'supernatural' . The resurrection, key to the story, was essential and so was included - but I did feel it wasn't being quite brave enough with Jesus' actions. He is seen comforting the sick but never healing them. I also felt the true impact of the resurrection could have been expanded on - simply by making the episode longer. Nevertheless, there was no doubt in the physical resurrection of Jesus and it wasn't toned down into a mere 'spiritual experience'. I really did feel a 'buzz' at seeing him again. I just wanted to see more of the risen Jesus - which must be a good thing. All things considered, it has been a powerful production which I would certainly recommend.

thoughts in the in-between

Easter Saturday. The in-between. The Sabbath when creation held its breath. It is the day we don't quite know what to do with. Of course, then, it would have been a day of sorrow - of continued mourning. But we know what came next, and we can anticipate it.

I went to a local garden centre with Bev this afternoon where we had coffee and earl grey tea - one each, not both together - and wandered around contentedly looking at things, chatting about this and that. I'm looking forward to tomorrow, although Andy and I have to perform this sketch at church, which I am nervous about. The trouble with not being very involved makes it harder to be relaxed when you do do things. Looking forward to singing 'See what a morning' which is one of my very favourite hymns but I always have to wait till Easter to sing it!

Weather as bizarre as ever. Sun is blazing down amid a blue sky - but it's snowed twice today.

We've been watching the BBC's The Passion. I got very engrossed last night. I think it is a good production - the atmosphere is very good, the setting excellent. Caiaphas and Pilate are very well done. I had many other thoughts last night while watching - positive and negative - sometimes it seems that Jesus' words have been skewed, and his character too uncertain - and of course you notice what's added in and what's missing. When it's a story you know so well and believe in, omissions and changes are far more glaring. Some things made me frown; however most thoughts were forgotten when we reached the crucifixion scene, whereby I broke down in tears. It was...excellently done, for want of a better a phrase. Any realistic depiction of the crucifixion always makes me struggle not to cry - in fact I hope it always does. It took sometime to compose myself afterwards because of course this is not just a story - this really happened - they really did crucify a man called Jesus all those years ago.


The portrayal of Judas' anguish was also very moving. I shall be very interested in how they handle tomorrow's episode. They seem to have carefully avoided and veered away from anything 'miraculous' until now, so the resurrection, the most miraculous of all...hmm. I hope they don't fuzzy it up too much. If they want to tell the story of Jesus as in the gospels, they cannot ignore it.


'His scent of wounds,
in which we are now wrapped,
carried us out of that petrified place
into the calm city
where even the dust has been healed.'
from Stewart Henderson's Only at Easter

just a bit of 'heelwork to music'...

My, the wind was certainly howling last night. Looking out of the window now, it's actually fairly settled. Was quite impressed that Charlie's hutch covers remained firmly battened down and are still in place this morning.
Quick entry before I go and sort some things out. Kaye will probably get here this afternoon, I think. I hope the weather's not too bad where she's coming from.

It's been Crufts this past week. I do confess I like to occasionally watch a bit of Crufts (it's not Andy's thing at all - he doesn't do dogs!) As usual I missed the agility bit, which I used to love as a little girl - I remember, cloudily, talking about it with Nanny (my grandmother, she died when I was 10 or 11). Perhaps I'm imagining it. Memory is a funny thing.

Still, I happened to turn the TV on just before 'Best in Show' last night - as usual I'd forgotten it was on but was quite happy to watch it. I was just in time to catch the following performance. Somewhat bizarre, though it shows how trained a dog can be...somehow I knew I'd find it on youtube this morning.

The guy introducing it has a somewhat theatrical voice, methinks. Or is it put on? Anyway. Must go and be busy!

gloomy Saturday

Blah...feeling excessively gloomy today. Not sure if the tablets on for my head/neck are affecting my moods. Whatever, I certainly feel blah today. I don't seem to have any appetite for anything. Cleaned Charlie's hutch. Watched last week's Lark Rise to Candleford. On Sunday it didn't record so I had to record the Sign Zone version on Thursday. I didn't expect to like it so much - there's not much plot really. But it's pleasantly gentle and I always smile when Dorcas says 'It's my one weakness!' about something different each week. We've started watching The Big Bang Theory which has been very funny so far. We rarely watch things when they're actually on, just things we have remembered to record.

I have little more to say except...blah.